Same-sex “marriage” advocates are pressing for a radical change to the definition of the family, asking every American to embrace a view of marriage that no human society has ever successfully adopted.  In essence, they want us to believe that gender – as revealed in the God-given glories and mysteries of male and female – does not matter, and that the biblically defined roles of husband and wife and mother and father are merely optional.

 

In the face of this radical ideological shift, we must ask: “How will an intentionally motherless or fatherless family affect the children involved?”  No one in the mainstream media is asking advocates of same-sex marriage to answer that vital question.  But the question must be asked, because among the many reasons why gay marriage is a terrible idea, its effect on the most vulnerable members of society – our children – will be the most devastating.

 

Indeed, an ocean of conclusive social science data collected over the past 40 years confirms that when children are denied either a mother or a father, they suffer in every important measure of well-being.  This is true of children from heterosexual marriages that are broken by divorce, separation, death, or other circumstances.  However, a child living in a same-sex home is, by definition, being intentionally and cruelly denied either his mother or father – and for no other reason than to fulfill adult desire.

 

Child Trends, a liberal child-advocacy group, reported in a recent research brief that “an extensive body of research tells us that children do best when they grow up with both biological parents…”[i]  Yet same-sex marriage denies them that very opportunity!  While the U.S. Census finds that the majority of children growing up in same-sex homes are living with two women,[ii] James Q. Wilson, one of the world’s most respected sociologists, warns, “Almost everyone – a few retrograde scholars excepted – agrees that children in mother-only homes suffer harmful consequences: the best studies show that these youngsters are more likely than those in [mother/father] families to be suspended from school, have emotional problems, become delinquent, suffer from abuse and take drugs.”[iii] 

 

If current demographic trends continue, more than half of the babies born in the 1990s will spend at least part of their childhood in single-parent homes.^[iv]  The widespread embrace of gay marriage will only serve to further damage an institution that is already on the brink of collapse.  What will happen if marriage does indeed become obsolete or largely irrelevant in the days ahead?  We can predict with certainty that almost every child will have several “moms” and “dads,” many more “grandparents,” and perhaps dozens of half-siblings.  Little boys and girls will be shuffled to and fro like house pets, surviving in a constantly changing set of circumstances and family members.  It is also likely that significant numbers of them will be raised in foster-care homes or be living on the street (as millions do all over the world today).  To a certain extent, many of these frightening scenarios are already becoming a reality in the United States.  Still, the destruction of the traditional family – and the resultant devastation of children – will be accelerated dramatically if so-called “gay marriage” is embraced by our society.

 

We need not speculate on this matter.  Numerous studies already confirm that intentionally fatherless or motherless families lower children’s health and well-being in a number of dramatic ways.  Let us examine some of the evidence.

 

Lowered Physical Health

 

A study in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior, published by two leading experts on how family make-up affects child health, found that “female-headed households reported the greatest number of chronic [physical health] conditions for their children, regardless of racial or ethnic status.”[v]

 

By stark contrast, a 1991 study in the Journal of Marriage and Family showed that general health-measure scores were 20 to 35 percent higher for children living with both biological parents compared to those living in single or stepfamilies.[vi]  Similarly, a study published in Family Planning Perspectives showed that the general health problems of children from fatherless families are increased by 20 to 30 percent, even when adjusting for demographic variables such as race or income.[vii]

 

Lowered Emotional Health

 

An analysis of more than 100 studies found that having a loving and nurturing father was as important to a child’s happiness, well-being, and social and academic success as having a loving and nurturing mother.  In fact, some studies indicated that father-love was an even stronger contributor than mother-love to certain aspects of child well-being.[viii]  Similarly, the National Center for Health Statistics found that children living with their biological parents received professional help for behavioral and psychological problems at half the rate of children not living with both biological parents.[ix]

 

Lowered School Performance

 

Children raised with only one biological parent are about twice as likely to drop out of school as children being raised with two biological parents.[x]  Children from biological two-parent families have higher test scores and grade-point averages.  In addition, they miss fewer school days, are less likely to repeat a grade,[xi] and have greater expectations of attending college than children living with one parent.

 

Higher Criminal Behavior

 

A 1993 study titled Underclass Behaviors in the United States found that the likelihood that a young male will engage in criminal activity doubles if he is raised without a father and triples if he lives in a neighborhood with a high concentration of fatherless families.[xii]

Forensic psychologist Shawn Johnston has said: “The research is absolutely clear…the one human being most capable of curbing the antisocial aggression of a boy is his biological father.”[xiii]

 

Higher Sexual Experimentation

 

The prestigious American Sociological Review found that 64 percent of young adults raised by lesbian mothers reported considering having same-sex sexual relationships.  Only 17 percent of young adults in heterosexual families reported the same thing.[xiv]

 

The absence of both biological parents in a young person’s life is also a contributing factor to teen pregnancy rates.  A white, teenage girl from an advantaged background is five times more likely to become a teen mother if she grows up in a home without both of her biological parents.[xv]  Similarly, a major study published in the Journal of Marriage and the Family found that boys and girls who did not live with both biological parents were more sexually active at younger ages.[xvi]

 

Higher Danger of Sexual/Physical Abuse

 

An alarming report in Ethology and Sociobiology reveals that preschool children who live with one biological parent and one stepparent are 40 times more likely to become victims of abuse than children living with a biological mother and father.[xvii]  Findings such as this led noted domestic violence researchers Martin Daly and Margo Wilson to conclude, “Stepparenthood per se remains the single most powerful risk factor for child abuse that has yet been identified.”[xviii]

 

What is more, a recent study published in the journal Pediatrics indicated that children residing in a home with a non-biological parent were eight times more likely to die of maltreatment than children living with two biological parents.[xix]

 

Conclusion

 

Dr. David Popenoe, the eminent family psychologist who has invested a lifetime of research in examining the irreplaceable role of fathers in healthy child development, notes:

 

“We should disavow the notion that ‘mommies can make good daddies,’ just as we should disavow the popular notion of radical feminists that ‘daddies can make good mommies.’ …The two sexes are different to the core, and each is necessary – culturally and biologically – for the optimal development of a human being.”[xx]

 

I agree wholeheartedly with Dr. Popenoe’s conclusion.  As this contentious issue continues to be debated in the culture, we cannot ignore the conclusive evidence proving that a child will suffer if he or she is deprived of the right to be raised by his or her biological parents.  It cannot be stated more clearly: children need a mother and a father!  Thousands of years of human history tell us that no society, ancient or modern, has ever sustained itself by embracing a family model that deviates from God’s design.  It is folly to suggest that two “fathers” or two “mothers” can ever meet a child’s needs in the same way that a mother and father together can.  And yet, with each shocking new development in the push for gay marriage, America’s children will continue to pay the price.

 

In light of this reality, we must ask ourselves what can be done to stop the push for gay marriage before it goes any further.  I am convinced that our only hope is for citizens to rise up in great numbers and demand that Congress and the state legislatures pass a Federal Marriage Amendment that defines the historic institution of marriage exclusively as being between one man and one woman.  Failure to do so will threaten the nation and, indeed, Western civilization itself.  I pray that we will do everything within our power to defend future generations against our society’s presumptuous and dangerous efforts to redefine an institution that has remained constant since the creation of the world.

 

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